The Whitness

Two gems from my favorite new distraction website:

Visit at totallylookslike.com

A while ago I think I promised to post pictures of my favorite signs that I’ve captured over the past eight or so years. I don’t know why but I’ve always gotten a kick out of signs with stick figure people in them. Most of the time, these stick figures are trying to warn you of some impending danger, or of activities and actions you should not partake in. I can’t remember what the first picture was that tickled me enough that I had to capture it on film, but since I’ve been such a delinquent blogger as of late I’ll try now to post all of my favorite signs and, where warranted, a brief back story. Let’s begin…

Low Ceiling

This one was in the shuttle that I took from some airport parking garage to the airport. This guy wants you to know that bumping your head is no joke and it’s going to hurt like a bitch!!

Neighborhood Watch

If you wear a trench coat and a hat, stay the fuck out of this neighborhood!!

Choking Hazard

this is the full-view of a poster teaching and endorsing the Heimlich maneuver. Check out the close up below:

That’s just a bit racier than the Heimlich I remember learning.

Don’t Rock the Boat (or the Vending Machine)

I think I was initially amused that this warning sticker even needed to exist. Then I remembered hearing about people getting trapped under vending machines when they tried to game the system (or get their money back). Anyway, apparently this warning sticker wasn’t clear enough about the dangers because later I saw this one:

the first guy is being risky, but this guy is totally screwed.

Exit in an Orderly Fashion:

That’s usually the instruction in case of an emergency, right? Well, the first guy got it right, but the rest seem a little more anxious to get out:

“doot doo dooo… What? There’s a fire behind me? No Problem.”

“There’s a huge fire behind me? Get out of my way!”

Get Out!!!

Get Down!!!

Escalator Rules 1:

So the first two rules seem reasonable: hold children’s hands, don’t put your foot on the side. I imagine people need to be reminded of those. The third one seems to be a much more rare situation. I would read it as “If you happen to be with a Shetland pony which has been severed in half, please pick up the front half and use the hand rail.”

Escalator Rules #2:

This one was in Paris at the Louvre. Again, the first two seem reasonable, but the second two seem to be banning specifically: French Poodles and Boots.

Clear and Present Danger: These need no captions

doesn’t that last box seem to suggest feeding your child to the Mountain Lion?

Potpourri: The rest of these deserve to be seen, but most could be explained with the caption “WTF?”

“Yeah, don’t do that, mmm-kay?”

(click for full size) this one seems to be saying “no graffiti, no littering, no bitch slaps.”

How considerate: Toilets for the armless.

“Oh Snap!”

“Oh Snap!”

Strangely here (unlike on escalators), parents are discouraged from holding their child’s hand.

I’m not Alone: One day browsing this internet I found I’m not alone in getting a kick out of signs like this:

(click for full size)

That’s all for now. In fact, I guess I haven’t officially posted an update. I got a job here in Atlanta (that I’m liking very much so far), and it’s severely cutting into my time and motivation to make blog posts. We’ll see if I get a second wind, but be forewarned that my slow trickle of posts might slow further to an occasional drip.